Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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