garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
