Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize