He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
