My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
