When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
