He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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