Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Sorry about my life...
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
