i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
