My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize