People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
