i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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