She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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