Sry I called you an 8
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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