my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Randomize