Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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