Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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