White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
