Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
