There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
