Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize