Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
So I just went to clothing optional bar
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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