You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Sext me about skeletons
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
