We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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