We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
