Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
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I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
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