I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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