I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
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Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
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