Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
