Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
