You're completely useless in the revolution.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Randomize
