I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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