Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?