Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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