wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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