what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
The feeling are messing with the penis
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
