is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Randomize
