My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
