I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
found the other keg... it's in the tree
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
