Apparently you make a good broom.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
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