ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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