I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Boobs speak an international language.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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