Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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