So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
