Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
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