We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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