I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Your dad touched me again.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Randomize
