garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
