You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
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