she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize